When people are very nice, it often has to do with a genuine desire to help others and make them happy. It’s a heartwarming quality, but being too nice for your own good isn’t always right. Such people have a tendency to ignore personal boundaries, are afraid of disappointing others, and have difficulty saying ‘no’ when they disagree with something or when a request exceeds their abilities or limits. They rely too much on the opinions of others. Obviously, all of this isn’t healthy and being too cool in a relationship can even end it!
To find out how being nice can affect a relationship, Health Shots checked in with Dr Chandni Tugnait, psychotherapist, life and business coach.
What does it mean to be great?
Dr. Tugnait explains that being too nice is a behavioral pattern where people consistently prioritize the needs and wants of others while neglecting their own needs and wants. This can lead to an imbalance in personal relationships and overall well-being. Therefore, it is important to strike a balance between kindness and self-care.
Reasons why being too nice is bad for a relationship
Being too good in a relationship often ends in a negative way. Here are some reasons:
1. Lack of self-personality
When one person is too good to be in a committed relationship, that person runs the risk of losing their sense of self. The expert says that they lose themselves in the process as their partner’s life and achievements cast a shadow over them. Maintaining a strong sense of self is very important for personal happiness and healthy, balanced relationships.
2. Suppression of Choices
When you don’t express your opinion on anything and just agree with your partner’s views to keep him happy, you end up stifling your own feelings and choices. It can be as small as deciding what food to eat.
3. Emotional Neglect
When one is overly focused on pleasing their partner, they may neglect their own emotional needs. By constantly prioritizing their partner’s feelings, they may fail to address their own feelings and emotional well-being. Experts say that over time, this can lead to emotional exhaustion and feelings of neglect.
4. Uneven power dynamics
Being overly nice can create an imbalance in the power dynamics in a relationship. A person who constantly prioritizes their partner’s needs may inadvertently lose their personal power, which can lead to an unhealthy dependency. Equal power dynamics are important to maintain a sense of mutual respect and equality.
5. Lack of boundaries
When a person continues to bow to the demands of others and sacrifice their own desires, it can lead to resentment and frustration. Establishing healthy boundaries ensures that the needs of both people in the relationship are met and respected.
6. Communication Problems
Being too nice can sometimes be a hindrance to open communication in a relationship. When one person is constantly trying to please the other, they may avoid voicing their concerns or engaging in difficult conversations. This lack of honest communication can lead to misunderstandings and prevent resolution of underlying issues.
7. Difficulty in conflict resolution
Excessive niceness can make it challenging to effectively address and resolve conflicts. Fear of confrontation and desire to maintain harmony can prevent necessary discussion and resolution of underlying issues. Healthy relationships are based on open and honest communication.
8. Enabling Negative Behavior
Constantly being friendly and being too nice can encourage negative behavior in a partner. By always apologizing and making excuses for their actions, a person can reinforce patterns that are harmful or toxic.
9. Unrealistic Expectations
When you establish a practice of putting your partner before yourself, you also develop some unreasonable expectations about how you treat them and expect them to reciprocate the favor, which ultimately breaks your heart.
10. Lack of authenticity
When someone constantly tries to please their partner, they may suppress their true thoughts and feelings in order to avoid conflict. This can lead to a lack of authenticity and genuine connection in the relationship.
The notion of being kind in a relationship or any other social situation has been ingrained in women since ancient times. But women have to stop being too nice to become more independent and live full lives and relationships.
Source link: sensationsix.com Source link: www.healthshots.com
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